Two weeks ago, I was violated by a professional. Or maybe by a couple of professionals.

Sounds wrong, doesn’t it?

Upon returning to my car on a sunny Sunday afternoon, I opened the driver’s side door to see my dashboard’s innards falling out. I froze and stared at the empty space where my CD deck used to be, and then squeaked at Brent, who had just walked me to my car. As he came back to see what was wrong,* I looked at my backseat floor; my laptop bag was gone, too. The laptop bag that had my precious little MacBook Air (a.k.a. my Entire Life) in it.

Cue wide eyes, dropped jaw, heart in stomach.

Yeah, someone ripped out my car’s sound system and made off with my laptop.

So annoying.

My wise friend Doniree also had things stolen out of her car this summer. She tells an eloquent story—and her discussion about how violating it is to be robbed sums up my own sentiments.

My thoughts about having $3,000 worth of equipment stolen? Annoying. And inconvenient. But it could have been so much worse. The thieves were professionals. So that meant no broken windows. Barely any damage to the dash where they pried out my CD deck. They ripped (cut?) the wires cleanly; they gently unlatched my custom-built 12-inch subwoofer box in my trunk. No dents on my doors. Even my gorgeous eggplant-colored, 40s-style pumps were sitting on my seat, untouched. (They obviously didn’t have size 7- 1/2 feet nor a taste for 3-inch heels. Good.) Oh–perhaps most significant of all: the Caligater went untouched.

They did an awesome job, all told. They were obviously professionals.

Yep, I was violated by professionals.

Which brings me to…the birth of a business. Namely, my business.**

I wrote about quitting my job and reprioritizing my goals. When I quit my job, I had zero inkling that nearly one year later I’d be working for myself as a copywriter and content creator (hahahaha, I love calling myself a “content creator”).

But what does being violated by professionals have anything to do with fixin’ my bid’ness, you ask?

It forced me to ask for help.

Ick.

I don’t like/ develop hives when /get heebie-jeebies from/am not good at asking for help. But I do all of my work from a computer. And I’m fresh out of a computer. So, I began to reach out to my rather amazing network to let them know that I am eagerly taking on new clients and projects in order to save money for a new computer.

And the response from my network? WOAH. My friends, acquaintances and connections have gone above and beyond to help a sista out by referring new clients and contracting out projects here and there.

I have been floored. And humbled.

And because I am talking to new clients and working on new projects, I’m also solidifying the fact that I am, indeed, running my own business. Business write-offs, 25%+ self-employment taxes and scope creep, here. I. come.!

Having my laptop stolen forced me to ask for help. And in asking for help, I’m growing my business. And I think I’m growing a little bit, too. (OK, hopefully I’m growing a lottabit.) I sense that this recent adventure will push me forward. Wheeee!

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*and by “came back to see what was wrong” I actually mean Brent called the cops for me, checked my entire car, searched the surrounding area for the slim possibility my bag had been dumped somewhere, and generally prevented me from losing my marbles. Hero material!

**I’m still trying to figure out my ACTUAL business name. I think Erika’s suggestion is the chompiest: “Consult-a-Gater, LLC: Making Business Bite-Sized” ^_^

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Coda | I’m still looking to begin work on new projects. :)  I’d love your help. *nudgenudge winkwink*

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totally sweet image via Stefan on Flickr

Two of my SXSWi roommates, Elaine Ellis and Ginger Pelz, each asked me the same question last week: “Do you have specific goals for the conference?”

Uhmmm…huh?

Yeah. I didn’t really have an answer. *hangs head in shame*

In the last few days, though, I’ve made some digital and literal space in my life. This space hints at an answer to the question Ginger and Elaine asked me.

• I plowed through my email inbox (People. There are four items in my inbox right now. *pats self on back*)
• I winnowed down my RSS feeder
• I closed Firefox last night and chose not to “save open tabs”
• I cleaned up Facebook personal info, photos and fan pages
• I pruned who I’m following on Twitter and blocked a bunch of spambots
• I moved and deleted a gaggle of files from my precious little MacBook Air
• I deleted apps on my iPhone
• I made a to-do list for projects for the next two months

Essentially, I’ve attempted to minimize my streams of information.

I want to create space & fertile ground for fresh ideas and new connections.

My SXSWi goal? Meet people. Begin meaningful relationships.

Who knows…I could encounter: my next bit of work, resources for writing my thesis, new friendships or innovative projects to collaborate on. Finding any one of these would be amazing. I’m already squeeeee-ing about getting to meet—in person—many of the people I’ve formed friendships with on the social web. So. Very. Excited.

So, as I’ve prepared for SXSWi, I’ve made space. I made sure all of my day-to-day stuff was taken care of; I’ve made a rough and I’m-sure-it-will-change-every-ten-minutes-anyway-list of panels and parties I want to attend; and most importantly, I’ve made space for new ideas and new people.

Coda:

My SXSWi goal, subpart 1: Hand out every single one of my swanky new Moo business cards. I don’t want ANY of these in my possession when I get home. :)

The Eye – by Kahlil Gibran

Said the Eye one day, “I see beyond these valleys a mountain veiled with blue mist. Is it not beautiful?”

The Ear listened, and after listening intently awhile, said, “But where is any mountain? I do not hear it.”

Then the Hand spoke and said, “I am trying in vain to feel it or touch it, and I can find no mountain.”

And the Nose said, “There is no mountain, I cannot smell it.”

The the Eye turned the other way, and they all began to talk together about the Eye’s strange delusion. And they said, “Something must be the matter with the Eye.”

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What do YOU see on your life’s horizon?

Perhaps your friends, family or coworkers are the ear, hand and nose — they don’t have the same vision for your ideas, projects and future as you do. That’s okay.

I place an immense amount of value in the advice and support that friends and family share with me. In fact, their guidance bolsters most of my life decisions. I’m grateful for that.

But sometimes we see a mountain veiled in mist in the horizon — a mountain we cannot hear, touch or smell. But we can see it.

As I walk toward the mountains in my horizon, I am undeterred…but not inflexible. I’m just trying to maintain my vision.

What do you see on your horizon? Are you moving toward it?

I had time to do a lot of thinking and writing while I was in Florida. And while I was thinking and writing, several things emerged that I want to work on. Here are some photos & thoughts from my trip.

knuckle & brawl

The Wine Room on Park Avenue in Winter Park, Florida, serves enomatic wine—it’s basically a restaurant-sized vending machine for wine. I vowed to pick wines solely by the silliest labels. This bottle, with a Popeye-esque boxer on the label, was delightful. And it reminded me to keep knucklin’ and brawlin’—to keep fighting the good fight. Even if I didn’t get to wrassle any gators.

float more

In Wekiwa Springs State Park, it was a brisk 50 degrees out, but the spring water was 72 degrees. I swam (okay—I doggy-paddled) in the clear water with minnows, cichlids and catfish nearby. I floated on my back for some time. With my ears underwater, all the noises of the state park were blocked out and my range of vision was only the sky. And I just floated. It reminded me to bring that kind of (figurative) buoyancy and quiet suspension to my day-to-day life.

shine brighter

203 steps lead to the top of Ponce Inlet Lighthouse, the second tallest masonry lighthouse in the United States. The lighthouse is solid brick and the Fresnel lens at the top can throw its light 20 or more miles to the horizon. Wow. 20 miles. And it made me wonder how far my light reaches. I want to shine brighter.

step into the shadows

It’s been about ten years since I’ve seen the Atlantic Ocean. I walked along a frayed and tired Daytona Beach, with piers in disrepair and hotels boarded up. It was late afternoon and my shadow was long. Despite my desire to shine brighter, I know there will be shadows. And I want to keep moving into shadows—because if I’m stepping into a shadow, I know there is light behind me.

manatees are awesome

Sea cows are adorable. I want to adopt a pet manatee, name him Herb and keep him in my bathtub. Hey, I’d settle just to hug a manatee. Can you imagine?

Blue Spring State Park counted 195 manatees the morning that we visited. They usually weigh a ton, eat up to 60 lbs of plants per day and have whiskers on their snouts. WHISKERS! Nothing profound here…manatees are just awesome.

icing on the cake: joie de vivre

Near the end of my trip, a friend and I exchanged some DMs on Twitter, and he gave me one of the brightest—and most humbling—compliments I’ve ever received: “Your joie de vivre is uplifting and inspiring.”

*melts*

I didn’t even know that I manifested a joie de vivre—a joy of life—even though I do have a joyful outlook on life, despite the trials and the shadows. But I realized that a joie de vivre envelops all of the things I’ve listed above. These are the items I want to work on in the coming days and months: knuckling and brawling, floating, shining and moving into shadows.

And maybe I’ll get to wrestle a gator. Or hug a manatee.

What were YOUR bests of 2009? Take the challenge!

My best restaurant experience of 2009? Really, it was a set of experiences–any time I visited Centro Latin Kitchen on Pearl Street in Boulder. Not only are the food and drinks at Centro nom to the max, but the waitstaff and management almost always make a meal just that much more enjoyable.

Taige Smith was a manager at Centro. He recently passed away unexpectedly and much, much too soon. The Elephant Journal wrote a post about Taige and his legacy. Taige had a heart-breaking smile, was a genuine listener and gave some of the best bear hugs that one could ever ask for. I am fortunate that I was able to share laughter and conversation with him during the past few years.

Taige Smith

Gwen Bell’s Best of 2009 Blog Challenge prompted me to think about the opportunities I had throughout 2009 to break bread with friends and family. Along with those memories, I’m keeping Taige in my thoughts.

Really, what better day than today–my 27th birthday–to share with you this new corner of my life?

I’d been wanting to start a blog. For awhile. And at long last, here I arrive and I am ready. to. rumble. I’m ecstatic to share, write, belly-laugh, goof off and listen. I hope you’ll stick around, comment (as you’re compelled!) and harass me.

Of note: a big, humongous THANK YOU! goes to Rahim Rahman. I once–briefly and in passing–mentioned that I’d love to have a website…especially if it were caligater.com. Months later, out of the blue, he surprised me with a ready-to-go site. Thanks, Rahim. <3

Much gratitude also to:

• my brother-in-law, Eric Rank, for his know-how and cheer-leading skills
• my magnificent friend, Erika Napoletano, for her crisis support and WordPress smarts

And to YOU, whoever you are, visiting this little digital corner o’ mine.